A friend of mine got a new kitten.
But… The kitten had been abandoned. Abandoned? Well, that happens.
But where was it abandoned, you ask?
It was stuffed in the tailpipe of a car.
“abandoned kitten that somebody had stuffed into the tailpipe of a car”. I only wish this were an example of a grammatical noun phrase with no semantic value.
What the FUCK was that about? I mean, who does this? How could anyone look at a kitten, and think “the best thing I could do with this small, innocent, and needy creature is stuff it in the tailpipe of a car”.
One of the reasons I’m Christian is that I accept the basic idea that, on the whole, humanity does need some kind of salvation. We’re just sick sometimes.
If you’re out there, and you’re the guy who stuffed that kitten in that tailpipe, I’ve got bad news for you: It found a loving home ANYWAY. Suck on that, asshole.
Comments [archived]
From: Badfish
Date: 2003-05-27 02:06:10 -0500
Were damn sick.
From: Badfish
Date: 2003-05-27 02:08:29 -0500
Whoever would do that needs a beating, Christian or not if I caught someone doing that I would kick their ass.
From: Defiant Heretic
Date: 2003-06-06 01:01:24 -0500
I’m in agreement with Badfish here. I would call the person who did that a worthless excuse for a human being, but it’s stories like this that make me wonder if the phrase has any meaning whatsoever.
From: VOW
Date: 2005-07-20 16:55:45 -0500
The tailpipe kitten is today a fat, sassy, happy cat who “talks,” purrs, cuddles, and does wonderful, catly things.
I can’t imagine life without him!
~VOW